When I was in university, I spent my summers in giant clearcuts in the middle of nowhere planting trees. It was grueling work because we were paid per tree, so the more trees we planted, the more money we made. Some days it snowed and it felt like a thousand knives pounding into my torn fingers each time they entered the frozen earth to plant a tree. Some days it rained and rained and I thought I might catch hypothermia. Other days the sun breathed fire with each breath and the black flies encircled me like a tornado, covering the sky, and hungry like a vampire, they left me dripping in blood.
One day I was out on a piece of land that was particularly isolated, minding my own business, planting away, when I looked up and there in front of me stood a black bear. Bears are common in Canada and the advice that we always hear growing up is to make a lot of noise and they will get scared and leave. So I started to sing at the top of lungs.
Unfortunately the singing piqued the bear’s curiosity. It stood up on it’s hind legs, cocked it’s head, and then came walking closer to me.
By this time my heart was pounding like a drum, I was sweating and panicking, and I dropped my treeplanting bags, backed away as fast as I could, made it behind a giant rock and then sprinted for 15 minutes to get out of there. When I finally caught up with my foreman and told him the story, he looked at me, shook his head, and said, “Oh, man. Nothing cool every happens to me!“
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Looks great! Simplicity always wins… and I especially love how you made the bear black and white and how it has a story behind it
I love Richard’s dream interpretations. And the mama bear image in lovely. A few years ago, my brother and I were lucky to meet your parents climbing Mt. Kinabalu in Borneo, and then to be their guests twice in KL as we traveled around Asia. They made us feel so much at home, like family.
I have since gotten married and have a son who will be two next week and a daughter who is six months old today. I have enjoyed your thoughts and meditations on parenting very much.
Your painting of your niece in the NICU was especially moving and beautiful to me. Not long after I read your post, my daughter was hospitalized for a very rare illness, infant botulism. She made a full recovery and is as happy and healthy as can be now (thanks goodness!) During two separate hospital stays, she had an IV, and a feeding tube in her nose. It was so painful and scary to see my lovely baby, who I had nursed and cared for myself and been with nearly every moment since she was born, being cared for by others, attached to monitors, with tubes taped to her body. I often thought of your image and was comforted by it. I used it to imagine that what seemed so clinical and horrifying for us, was indeed the medical cocoon that Gracie needed to live and thrive. It was the case… all of that medical care, carried her safely through. Thanks for sharing your very thoughtful writing and art!
I love it that you did this painting and made this post. Yesterday I was writing for my new book on how to get really positive memories. It is so nice to read Rose’s comments also because we had such a good time with her and her brother right before she got married. When people are being chased in a dream, it has a lot to do with feeling alone and abandoned. The other day I introduced a chasing game in my classes with 5 years, not surprisingly called bears and squirrels. I had just been doing the work on how chasing dreams are related to abandonment when one of the little boys became extremely frightened in the game and didn’t want to play. I immediately thought to myself that this game makes him feel abandoned so I went over to him and told him he could hold my hand and be a bear with me. After that he had a lot of joy in the game.
What great dreams. Of course, they speak to me, because I share the host-aholic issue, and was mainly responsible for you inheriting this legacy. My problem is I always want to make everything complicated (It’s that Persian cooking thing – make cooking as difficult as possible) I love how we can all move forward in our paths to wellness, and help each other in the process. Thankfully, we have an Example to guide us. We can follow in the footsteps of Abdu’l-Baha, and offer others simple, loving hospitality. That’s my goal.
Thank you everyone! It’s great to hear your thoughts and comments.
I guess the whole reason we get into the negative patterns, like the host-aholic, is because we fear that we will be abandoned (not loved, criticized, judged) if we don’t put on a good show.
Playing chase is one of the most favorite games around here, but usually Fiona doesn’t like to play it because she can’t keep up with everyone. So I usually hold her and we run together after the others. I like the Bears and Squirrels name for it. We’ll have to try that too.
I’m so glad your baby survived, Rose. Going through that time can be really stressful. It’s great to hear about the travels you did with my parents.
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